I remember the moment, sitting in 8th grade English class early on September 11, 2001. Our teacher announced to us that something had happened, gave us a few details, and told us to be calm. We got sent home early from school early that day. I called my mom when I got home and she told me it would be best if I didn't turn the TV on until she got home. But I couldn't resist. I sat on my mom's bed watching the scene over and over again, sobbing. I was full of confusion, unable to understand what was going on. I just cried and cried - aching to understand...how could hate win?In the past ten years, I have had a life full of many blessed experiences. Yet the confusion has stuck with me, and at times has been even stronger than on that day in 8th grade when I was sobbing in front of the television. When Osama bin Laden was killed just a few months ago, Americans celebrated in the street. And again, hatred won. My heart breaks again and again when I see the footage from ten years ago or I hear the stories of friends who have lost a parent on that fateful day or friends who have lost a loved one in Afghanistan or Iraq. I ache. I cry. I pray. I hope...for a day when love finally gets to win...
Though I do not believe I have seen that day, I have found a place where love always comes out on top. In three short weeks, I have experienced love in so many new ways at Joseph's House - ways that restore my hope. Love is expressed in such a special way in this house. I have seen death and I have seen rebirth...and with each period of transition and transformation, love is at the forefront.
When I first began at Joseph's House, there was a resident who was dying. He quickly declined after an opportunistic infection caused his immune system to become overwhelmed. In the six days that I was allowed to be in his physical presence, there was no moment when his bedside was empty. Each time I walked by his room, someone was sitting there with him in the silence. Each held his hand to let him know they were there with him, that they love him, that they are forever grateful to have had the chance to know him. Watching this was transformative. The day he died, we all gathered at the house. His family came to see him, and together we stood - his two families - and comforted each other. Though I did not know him prior to his dying, and I surely did not know his family, the love I felt in the house was stronger than I had ever felt. There we were, side by side, black and white, old and young. So many things could have separated us if we allowed society to dictate that moment. But love got the chance to win.
Just the other day, we had the opportunity to say good-bye and good luck to another resident who is well enough to move out of Joseph's House. We all sat together in the living room and one by one, expressed our love and gratitude to her, as she did the same. She is not American and speaks little English. We were lucky to have a translator on the phone to help us communicate all that wanted to be expressed that day. But even if we hadn't...there was a mutual language of love present that day. Through the tears and the smiles, no words even had to be used. Love was present in the hugs, and the kisses, in the bows of gratitude. Love had the chance to win.
My heart is breaking today as I think about all that happened ten years ago. I remember the fear, the hurt, the confusion. I remember the tears. But I also remember the unification, the love, the pride that came after that day. So much could have separated us as Americans, and somehow this country came together.
My heart still hurts as I reflect on the ways that hate has won. But I am so grateful and blessed to be at Joseph's House where I finally have the chance to see love win.
This very day last year, I closed my blog post with a prayer by Pope Benedict XVI during his visit to Ground Zero in 2008, and I will do so again:
"God of peace, bring your peace to our violent world: peace in the hearts of all men and women and peace among the nations of the earth. Turn to your way of love those whose hearts and minds are consumed with hatred. God of understanding, overwhelmed by the magnitude of this tragedy, we seek your light and guidance as we confront such terrible events. Grant that those whose lives were spared may live so that the lives lost here may not have been lost in vain. Comfort and console us, strengthen us in hope, and give us the wisdom and courage to work tirelessly for a world where true peace and love reign among nations and in the hearts of all."
Please...never forget that together we can allow love to win every day. What will you do to make sure that happens?
